New Day.

Took yesterday off.

Probably shouldn't have...

doing so, will make this day...doubly long.

but...

I, needed that time.

 Truly.

It's raining this morning, so will concentrate on inside work, until it clears off.

Didn't have the 'Come to Jesus'...meeting with The Boys, yesterday.

figured...if they don't know better, by now...whatever I say, at this point, won't matter...anyway.

It's not like they're 'Kid's...anymore.

and...

I was still pretty angry.

Conversations beginning with anger, don't end up well.

Most likely...will have LOTS of Prisms, and Chandelier 'Parts'...to sell, in the near future.

Brought back a lot of Memories...when I saw those chandeliers buried, likely...very, broken Chandeliers, of when John...had little respect for Mama's 'Junk'.

It was painful, back then.

One of the worst arguments, John and I ever had...was over the 'Old Souls'.

I'd been gathering all sorts of rare, and unusual things for the room we were going to put on the house.

Things...you can't go to a lumber yard, to buy.

Had part of a staircase in the kitchen, I was working on.

; )

John...came inside, from busting his butt, all day, kicked off his boots, and stubbed his toe, on one of the pieces.

oh dear.

{It was Tight in the old part of the house, for a long time...John, was getting sick of it, I knew.}

John...Lost It!!

He'd Had Enough!!!

Enough of This Old "Shit"...In The Way of Our 'Living Space'!!

There was no other place for me to work on it.

John...was Literally HOPPING Mad.

oh my.

I...just stood there, watching John...melt down.

Then... said, quietly....

"You're right, this is a mess. I'll get rid of it all, and I'm leaving with it."

John knew...I meant it.

I, explained...that these old pieces I'd salvaged... are not only saving us an unimaginable amount of money, when we build, but...it's better, cooler...than Anything we could buy new, today.

but...

more than that, I have a Passion, for these Old Souls, their Beauty, 'Soulfulness'.

I, just couldn't keep defending them, anymore.

John...at that time, was just beginning to understand these old souls.

We worked it out...obviously.

; )

It took others, to help John 'See'.

: )

When his Good 'Contractor'...Friends, were Blown Away, by John's Amazing Work, and the Architectural Pieces, that they, who'd built New Homes, for decades couldn't begin to figure out...how to incorporate, or...even Find, to use....

Then, John...understood, what Gems, these Toe Breaking...{and 'back breaking'} pieces, truly were.

<3

I've always had vision...

maybe, sometimes....to a fault.

and...

it frustrates me, when others...can't 'see', find The Beauty.

Especially...those I Love.

I, don't always...'see'...feel the Passion, that they do, in Their 'Loves'...

but, I always support, and respect... All of Them, in Theirs.

Always.

That's all I've ever asked, in return.

I remember being so Proud...of that Beautiful, 1800's 24 foot Curved Balcony, that I stumbled across, in Savanna, Illinois...when we were just beginning to build.

Didn't get home...until midnight, had it on the 81 Ford Ton Truck, in two pieces.

Couldn't Wait...for John to see it, at daybreak.

John...took one look at it, and...was not impressed.

He said....

"What do you expect me to do with 'That'....??? I'm a 'Wood Butcher', I can't use that."

My heart sank.

First of all, I Knew...John was an Artist, not a 'wood butcher'.

Also knew...I, couldn't imagine our Home, without it.

I, could See It, All of It....before we broke ground.

Decided, if John...couldn't work with it, I'd sell it, and find a cool, straight rail.

Which, I did.

Found one...out of a Church, with Amazing Gothic Turnings.

As John kept working on the house....I..got sicker, and sicker...about selling that Balcony.

I, couldn't Imagine this Room, without it.

so...

Bought it back, from my Pal, Patti, who was using it for display....in her store.

You should've seen John's face...when I pulled in with it strapped on The Ford Ton Truck.

; )

oh my.

Told John...if This..is The Only Thing...we have to Hire done, I'll figure out a way to pay for the labor.

; )

John, and I sat down....and figured out how to incorporate the Crown Jewel.

<3

To this day...I, still...can't Imagine, this room...without it.

The top of the rail...is covered in carved initials, from decades of Kids...

I, told John, that if he didn't like that, I'd fill them, and paint over them.

John...had a Fit.

Said...that's One of the Coolest Things, about The Balcony.

; )

He, then...carved Our Initials in it.

<3

Yeah.

Seemed after that...John started working on Furniture, the Old...Souls, and...became a Master, with them.

<3

Something...I always Knew, John had in him.

'Artist'.

<3

I jumped on Son, Justin...pretty hard, the other day.

Brandon, too.

Began watching the city council videos....that night, too.

oh my.

There's been So Much, carnage...around here, that...never should've been.

Trying to find a spot...for a single tent, was overwhelming, alone.

so...yeah, it doesn't take much...to push me over the edge, these days.

I'm pretty raw, all the way around.

New Day....

today.

Love to Ya....

Prayers, for All.

Barb C.