Two...out of Three, ain't good enough.

Headed down the rabbit hole, this morning.

Took two days...off.

Had to check, and see....how the rabbit hole managed, after the Big Rains, Storms, and..with me being absent, for so many days.

Like...always, it was fine... : )

 Welcomed me...inside, with open arms.

<3 

It, always...always, does.

: )

Seems,

 it always holds me a little tighter, when I'm hurting.

Soothes my spirit, when I need it...the most.

 Took a look around, trying to figure out, where...to begin, again.

Some...I, guess, might be overwhelmed.

: )

I'm so numb....'overwhelming'...doesn't have a chance.

Not, much...does.

I was thinking of the tune, 'Two out of Three...ain't bad', this morning,

 as I was sitting outside, sippin' my coffee.

It was such a pretty morning.

The dew...was heavy, on the grass.

Each blade, looked like it had a big...diamond, leaning from the tips.

<3

The Birds, were busy...gathering, and singing. : )

The lyrics, from the tune...really, hit home.

"I want you...

I, need...you,

 but...there ain't no way....

I'm ever gonna love you."

Keep, thinking, about the saying...

'There's nothing as cold, as ashes...

once, the fire...is gone.'

I, suppose, most would think of these thoughts...as a 'Relationship', between two people.

To, me...it's about my 'job'. 

'Work'.

I, suppose, I've...been so very Blessed, to 'Love'...my 'job'.

Have, such a 'Passion'...for it.

Thankfully, never...have had these emotions, because of falling out of Love, with John.

<3 <3 <3 

I, understand...them, now...though.

: (

I, think...it must be, like...people feel, when they fall out of Love, with one another.

: (

With what I...'do', 'Passion', is a Big...Deal.

It's...Everything, 

really.

I..lost it, somewhere....a little over 5 years ago, when John left. 

I, kept 'working'...at it, and...doing the very best, I could.

Gave it Everything, I had...left.

It's not enough.

It's...fallen...

flat. 

: (

Shows, are over...for me.

The only place....I can find, 'feel'....anything, at all...

is down the rabbit hole.

My...little Sanctuary.

: )

As much, as I Love it, I'm not sure...It'll be 'enough', to sustain 'Tara', without doing the 'Shows'.

The bills, are enough to choke...me.

I've been looking into getting my CDL, and going back, to driving Truck.

'Passion',

 isn't one of the requirements...for hauling loads, and shifting gears.

I'm very...very, good....at moving those big trucks, down the road.

: )

I'm going to put the rabbit hole, back on it's feet.

Be open...much more, after I do.

We'll see...how it goes.

If...we can make it happen, that's what I'll continue to do.

If...it doesn't work, that'll be fine, too.

I'll go back to driving, and...hang out, in my 'Sanctuary', as much...as I can.

Like, 'Tara'... in 'Gone with The Wind', I...get my 'strength', there.

: )

'Home'.

It...envelops, me.

 Embraces, me...with 'Soulfulness',

 every time....

I step through the gnarly, Wild Grape, and Bittersweet... laden, arched Entrances. 

<3 <3 <3 

I'm going to finish out the year...with Junk Jubilee, in Des Moines, in November.

I, will probably...sublet my booths, at Gold Rush. 

Not, ready...to give them up, just...yet.

Saw these little leaves, outside my booth, as I was loading...

 from a plant...that was in a booth, at Gold Rush.

They'd been walked on...trampled.

I, couldn't leave them.

Scooped them up, salvaged what I could...gave them a drink...in the only...little vessel, I had.

Wrapped them up, and placed them, in a safe corner, by the back door...of the FUSO, 

Took them out, this morning.

: )

They rode safely...and, to my surprise...after bouncing down some of the roughest roads, on 63, in northern Iowa...

I, don't think...a drop, spilled. : ) 

I, don't know...if they'll take root, or not.

I, do...know, they didn't have a chance...baking, on that asphalt. 

All we can do, is the Best...we can.

<3 

Love...to each, and...Everyone.

Please, remember...to keep all, who are struggling, and suffering...today, in your Prayers.

<3

Barb C.