Time...will tell.

I was thinking this morning...

What a Beautiful Gift....

'Being Heard', is.

I, remember...over the years, dealing with Dr's....for Mom, how the Best Ones...

always 'Heard'...Mom's concerns.

My...beloved Dr., who took Mom, and John....on, as Patients, near the end of their lives...

was such a Blessing....to us all.

<3

I, remember...every time, he'd visit with Mom....he'd drop to one knee, beside her wheelchair.

<3

Mom...was blind, but....that didn't matter to him.

He'd look into her eyes, as if she could see him.

He always...spoke directly to her.

<3

Mom, often... had difficulty coming up with her words, because of a brain tumor.

Our Dr., would...patiently wait, until...she could finish her thoughts.

<3 

{Makes me cry...just thinking about....how, Compassionate he is.}

Dang.

 

I, often refer to him...as a 'Saint'.

: )

I was thinking....about what I'd written, about the 'Good'...People, in my life...

the other day.

They've helped me, so.

They're all professional people, who do their Jobs, very well.

but....

They, are So Much More...than That.

They...are Compassionate People, First.

That's a Big...Deal.

They listen, and...hear.

That's...a Big....Deal.

I...feel guilty, for getting so angry, 'frustrated'...with the IDOT Engineers, sometimes.

I, know...they're sharp.

The ones I've dealt with...seem to be very nice people.

It's so damned frustrating, when they don't 'hear'.

Someone...told me a while back, she'd never seen anyone, who could go from 0, to 100, so fast, with my temper.

: (

It's not...my temper.

It's frustration.

Something...I truly, need to work on.

I...can't stand, waste.

Especially...when it could've been so easily avoided.

Every day....I try, to figure out, how....to look at things, that are not very pretty, and...find the beauty.

It used to be so easy.

I could always find the beauty, in what so many others, would dismiss.

{Dad, showed me...by example, how to do that. <3 }

It's not easy...anymore.

That's...frustrating.

When everything, is so ugly, and...there's no ability, to see through it.

Can't seem to Find...that gem, nugget...of beauty, anymore.

Something....to build on.

It worries me, sometimes....that I'll never be able to 'see'.

I, too...can do my Job, but...it's not the same, anymore.

It shows.

{at least...to me, it does.}

A person...can run on fumes, for a long....time.

But...they won't run well.

Certainly...not their best.

That's why...I'm so Grateful....for those around me, that can still 'see'.

I, know...so many...have their own Mountains.

Yet, somehow...they keep moving them.

Maybe, there's hope....yet.

: )

I should make an appointment, and go see the 'Saint'.

: )

Last time I saw him, after my horrible bout with asthma, from the concrete dust, we visited...for a long....time.

: )

He, too...saw me go from 0, to 100, when he asked me about this Road Mess.

hahahaha...

{Glad his Awesome Nurse, Lea... took my blood pressure, Before....this 'subject' was brought up. 

ZING!!!! hahahaha... }

oh my. 

Had a Lovely...lunch, with my Dear Friend, Patti, on Sunday.

She, lost her Husband...a few months ago.

My heart...is so broken, for her.

We're both, trying to prop each other up...these days.

<3

Even, Patti...with all of her Hurt, goes from 0, to 100, in Warp Speed, when we discuss what's happening here.

She inspires me, in so many ways, and...tries to encourage me, by saying....she sees the rabbit hole, sitting in the middle of this carnage, as a 'Cameo'.

 <3

She...can still 'see'.

I think of the Alison Krause tune, " Can't Find My Way Home", often.

That's how I feel.

I, can't find my way...'Home'.

Everything...seems so foreign.

I'm grateful...the IDOT is replacing our septic system, that was broken...with this project.

Makes me sad...too, because...what's left, that's not been disturbed, soon...will be, for that.

I, often...wonder, when this is behind us, will...I be able to find my way...

'Home'.

Does 'Home'... even exist...anymore.

Guess...only time...will tell.

Love...to You.

Barb C.