Something.... something.

The last few of days....

have been Real... Eye...Openers.

oh my.

I have been Blessed.... with some...Amazing...Angels.

Ones... who shed tears.... when they entered the rabbit hole.

oh my. 

When I came up... from the rabbit hole... last night....

I sat down... and... processed.

oh my.

I began loading images... from...the rabbit hole....taken over the last few years.

Many... I think...were captured by Sharon Roberts... some, by Melody Smith...

 some by Audrey Novak....and other Beautiful Photographer Friends. 

<3

The weekend.... was quite slow.

Perfect.

It was a Gift... from the Lord.

The Folks... who walked through the door....

all... made me realize.... so... very... very...much.

I have struggled... inside...and out, for a long...long...time.

If... I could stay in bed... every day... I would.

The many obligations... in my life, won't allow me to.

I've wondered... if it's time... to move on.

Find other means...of survival.

My heart...is heavy. My spirit... is broken.

Passion... is something....that seems soooo long...long...lost.

I always thought.... what I do..... anyone can do...anyway.

A Friend... has told me... for years, I have a gift.

I...never believed it.

She said... "God gives us all... 'gifts'... we need to honor Him... by using them."

I've struggled with that.

I can 'do'... most anything. I'm not afraid of work.

There is a huge... part of me... that wants to simply...surrender.

but... 

there's a part of my inner being...that whispers...

 shames me....

into feeling like... I'd be 'selling out'.

I don't mean... 'monetarily'. 

If....I lost every Thing... tomorrow... yet, I knew... I did the Best... I could....

well... I'd walk away... with a smile.

but...

I mean... Spiritually.

If I walked away... because... I'm 'tired'... and wanted to find an 'easier' way...

well...

that... would be 'selling out'...

Selling my 'self' out.

I'm not sure.... I could live with that.

As numb...as I am... to most Every 'feeling'... that little voice... makes me wince.

so... I keep... moving forward, tho it be... ever...so slowly.

I began pulling the shop together... last week, for this Midwest Show Weekend.

I had very few... people come in.

The ones... that did... really... really... touched me. 

One...was a customer/Friend, I hadn't seen in years.

She's a Wonderful... Decorator/Designer.

She brought her Best Friend... from 7 hours away.

Seems, my Friend, and myself... have been running parallel dreams...of sort.

We didn't get into... the depths.... yet, I could feel it. 

She said... like, myself.... she has pulled back... from everyone... hasn't been anywhere....

for a long... long... time.

I was Honored... they came to visit...me. 

They spent several hours... combing through the rabbit hole.

Came back... the next day... and spent almost.... the entire day... going through.

When they first came in... my Friend said... she just wanted to cry.

{I laughed...and said... "Yeah... : ) I find myself looking around...at what needs to be done... and I... want to cry too!!! : ) }

She didn't laugh.

She, and her Best Friend... were deeply... moved... by the Spirituality of the rabbit hole.

or... that 'Something.... something'... that I can't ever put my finger on... when I'm there... but...

it envelops me... and.... embraces me... every time... I step inside.  

We visited a bit... about how difficult... it is... to find... 'inspiration'... these days.

I have searched... for it... over and over. 

It's not out there. 

I finally realized.... inspiration... doesn't come from outside influence.

You have to pull it from yourself... deep inside... yourself.

The Girls... looked at each other... and said... "We have been trying to figure these things out... between us... for days, then... we walk in here, talk to you...for 10 minutes...and...it's like you read our minds.... and answered every single question.".

oh my.

That... happened...over....and over....and...over.... again, all weekend.

I have wept... over...and over...and over...again...

with Folks... who shared so many personal stories with me.

Folks... I have never met before... maybe... will never see again, on this earth.

I feel Blessed... I wasn't busy.

{tho... The Bank... may not see it that way... in the morning. : ) }

I was allowed the time... to 'share'... with these Travelers. 

It made me realize... I am... where I need to be.

I... don't make a lot of money....but... I know... the Lord... will provide...what I need.

because... I'm counting on Him... 

He did give me a 'Gift'.

He won't let me down... if I... persevere. 

yes... the thought... of sitting in a truck.... having no distractions...

being... by myself.... sounds so Good...at times... these days. 

oh my.

but... that isn't what I am supposed to do.

I was 'shown' that... over and over...and over....

this weekend. 

The little rabbit hole... with all of it's Chaos....

is my Sanctuary.

seems... it is...and has been... for others... as well. 

: )

I also... heard that... over and over...and over. 

I sat for hours... last night... looking through images.

oh my.

Some...were painful... but... the ones... of the rabbit hole...

well...

they... soothed my soul. 

: ) 

There's that 'Something....something'.... 

that... I still... can't put my finger on.

but....

It's Good.

It's All...

Good. 

: ) 

Love...to ya.

Barb C.

I walked into the Bedroom.... last night.
Looked up... on top of the Old Wardrobe... and saw 'The Hatter's Hat'.
I pulled it down...
blew the dust... off the top...
put it on my head...
and took this image.
It fit..... just like it did.... years ago.
The first song... that came to my mind...
was 'Something' by The Beatles.
It was the rabbit hole's song.
yep.