Hope you all... had a Beautiful Day....
filled to the Brim....
with Blessings. : )
I was up...late.... Thanksgiving Eve....
had... a melt down.... : )
Received a couple of calls....
that threw my evening...out of whack....
I had to wait...for one of the calls.... that evening.....
so... kept busy prepping...
Sat down with the 1865 Cookbook....from the Amana Sale.....
searching.... for a Sweet Potato Pie....
recipe.
then... it hit me.
out of all...the groceries.... I had dragged home....that day.....
I hadn't bought eggs.
and...
I couldn't leave...to get any.
{had to be close to all of the paperwork...}
Something... started to boil... inside.
I knew...this was going to be tuff....
It was nearly 7.... by the time I got the call...
then...another followed it.... that rattled my cage...a little more....
all the time.... I was sitting... at the end of the Old Harvest Table...
looking at the chair... at the other end....
knowing....it would be... empty... for the first.... time....
and....
I forgot to buy...eggs.
No.... Sweet Potato Pie.
I, know.... to some.... that really.... doesn't sound... like a big deal.
It was to me.
a very....Big...Deal.
I sat down.... posted it... of fb.... and mixed a Black Russian....
{John's Fave...}
a little while...later.....
I had a knock... at the door.
It was my Fairfax Neighbor....
Kathy....
with 8 eggs.
and...a Big... Shoulder.
: )
oh my....
What a Blessing... she is.
She told me.... to go to bed.... take things on...
in the morning.
I, agreed.
I...was.... done.
then...
I got a Burst of Energy.....
Whipped up those Pies... scrubbed floors.....
it was after Midnight....
before I turned the oven off....
I had been posting the Pies...in Progress...on fb....
My Friend, Linda... saw them.... and said... "Are You Still Up?"
"I'm on my way home.... could be there..in 20!"
I told her...to Come On!
: )
She had a couple bottles of wine... under her arm....
We sat...and visited... until 3:30.....
oh my.
Linda lost her Beloved... nearly a year ago.
Seems... we find ourselves... in similar... boats.
As I sat there... and thought.....
while visiting with her.....
It wasn't the Nerve Racking calls....
that had me so....
'Rattled'....
it was the eggs.
There is much.... I knew, that wouldn't be the same....
this Thanksgiving.
Things... I can't change.
but...
I was soooooo Determined... to keep Thanksgiving.... as close....
to 'normal'....
as I could.
For... all of us.
Without... those Pies....
the oven going...'til all hours.....
well... it seemed.... as I had feared....
nothing...would be....even...semi 'normal'... again.
Who would have thought.... a half dozen eggs...
for a couple of pies....
could be...so important.
I was up... by 7:30.... got the Stuffing goin'... : )
{I want that Stuffing...to be my Last Request...my Last...Meal.
oh my.... it's insanely... delicious. }
When I told... Kathy, the night before.... I...didn't know how.....
I was going to get through.... the day.... looking at that empty chair....
she said... "Fill it Up... Fill it up... with John's Favorite Things!"
she went on to say....
"John's Here... : ) He'll Never Leave You... He's Right.... Here!"....
I...know, that's true... because... I couldn't stand... being here, without him.....
I'm.... getting through.
My... Soul..... must know... he's here.... or I couldn't find....any peace.
Justin arrived.... earlier than the rest of the Kids.
{He is...Our Early Bird.: ) }
It was so nice... visiting with him.... we seldom..... 'visit'.....
as I looked at him..... such a Big....Man. : )
{when I hugged him.... I said... I think you've grown 6 inches taller..... : ) }
He's a Good.... Man.... : ) John...was so Proud...of Him. : ) {me...too. : ) }
He walked in the dining room..... and.... it hit me.....
Justin... should sit... in his Dad's Chair...
That's what John... would want.
I... simply said....as I looked at The Chair....
"Justin... why don't you.... sit here, today. : ) "
nothing more.... was said...
: ) : ) : )
Liz and Katie.... prepared some Wonderful Pies... and Sides....
Liz, cooked the Turkey... and brought it....
it was Beyond. : )
When Liz peeled the foil...off the Turkey....
she said... "Mom.... look at this.... do you see it?"
It was a perfect little... 'Heart' shape........ that the steam... had stained... into the Foil.... around the Heart.
: )
oh my....
: )
We had way...too much food.... but, then...we always do.
As we all sat.... eating away.... it was quiet.....
I heard something....
like a timer...ticking.
I asked.... "What's that....noise.... it sounds like a timer....
{I don't use a timer... for anything...}
what's that.... 'ticking'...sound????"
We...all... looked around..... the room... trying to figure out... where the noise was coming from.....
Then.... I saw it.
Looking right at me.....
{literally.... it has little glass eyes... that move back and forth...when it tics....}
It was the little Owl Clock.
I haven't wound the clocks.... any of them...since John got sick.
That was his...Sunday Job.... : ) and...I said.... until he was back on his feet....
they would stay...silent.
The little clock.... only runs for a day....on each wind..... and... it's missing it's pendulum... so... we never wound it.... much, anyway.... it's...just cute. : )
It hangs...too high...for the little ones to reach....
and... none of us.... touched it...
so... Kathy is right....
John... is... here...with us.....
but, then....
my Heart...and Soul....
already... knew that.
: )
Love to ya....
Barb C.
Well.... I just got a Big.... Surprise!
A Young Woman....... just walked in the House.....
into the Big Room.....
didn't knock....
just... walked in. : )
Polly.... was not... happy.
oh dear.....
{the door was unlocked from the Kids.... going in and out.... downstairs....
I... have been sitting here... crying... as I write....
I'm still in my apron... from yesterday... that I slept in.....
I'm wearing an old ripped and torn.... Flannel Shirt.... under it...
the sleeves.... just hang......big....tares......
haven't brushed my hair...or teeth.....or washed my face.
{I must have looked like an Old Witch to her... as I stood...stunned.... on the landing..... looking at her...just inside... the door.... being harassed Loudly.... by Polly......at her feet. }
I had one sock on.... but... both shoes.... because the floors are cold.... and didn't bother to look for the other....sock....that's probably... under the covers...somewhere.....
I...am a mess.
She said she wanted a wash tub.... for her Christmas Tree.... base.
and...saw I have one.... at the rabbit hole.
: )
I burst out.... in tears.....
{after I got Polly.... put away..... and came to my senses.... of sorts...quickly....took off my shoes...and sock... so...I didn't look... quite... so frickin'.... INSANE!!! oh my....before I walked down...stairs...to her.}
The young Woman... felt so bad... I could see.....
oh my....
I sold her the old tub....
apologized... profusely... about the house.... and mines....
appearance....
and said.... well.... I at least.... made my feet... match... for ya. : )
I explained.... this is our home...not the shop.....
and... I obviously...
wasn't expecting Guests. : )
She said.... "Oh...That's o.k. : ) "
when she left....I locked... the door.
Today.... the day after Thanksgiving....
John and I... always put our tree up.....
{oh... he hated that job.... but... would do it... for me....
there were a couple years.... times were so...ruff.....for one reason...or another..... I'd said... to him....
"maybe...we'll just not do a tree.... this year.....my heart....just isn't in it...."
then... I'd come home....
and he'd have it up.... for me.
He knew.... how Much.... Christmas... meant to me.
God Bless Him.....
This... has been workin' on... and workin' on me..... since... he left us....
oh my.......
oh... my.
So.... I sit... back... in my chair... here...at the Old Harvest Table.....
and.... wonder.....
how... do I do this. : )
oh my. }
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