Saturday, November 17, 2012

Beneath My Poised...Appearance.... : )


It was...All...of That!!!

I was Soooo...looking forward to attending my Dear Friend, Klarika's... Naturalization Proceeding... Friday.......
Had been planning on it all week...
She has worked so Hard... to become an American Citizen...
She is from Slovakia...
I can't imagine...how difficult it must be..
I thought...how would I... begin...in another Country...
Learning...another Language...
{I struggle...with English!}
and...Learning...all about...the Laws...and History...as well...oh my...
I wouldn't...miss this...for Anything!!!
The Invitation she gave me... had the time of 12:30...to be there...
I thought...when I got up......
 That gives me Plenty of time...to get my work done...Shower...and Dress...
I wanted to dress... Nicely...
after all... this is a Very Important Event...
at The New... Federal Court House....
I couldn't wait!
{I am Soooo Proud of Her!!!}
I got chores done... then...sat down...and ate a snack...
watched a little t.v., took Polly out...
{Plenty of time...:  ) }
Then...thought...I'd better jump in the shower...
When I went to put my Best Dress on...
I found...
It Didn't Fit!!!!
{ I looked like a Sausage...in it!!!}
{I Knew I shouldn't have had that Snack!!!
OR...the Last 150 Snacks...that has put a Frickin' Tire around my Middle!!!}
Holy Smokes...!!!!
{I don't have many 'Dress Clothes'!!!!!}
I started taring through the closet... wet hair...
No Make Up!!!!
TIC TOC!!!!!!
Couldn't find my new Nylons...!!!
I finally found a skirt... that fit... but...
 it was Tooooo Short!!!!
{and...LOUD!!! it looked like a '70's Flash Back!!!}
Oh My Gosh!!!!
I have...by now...strewn clothes...All Over the Bedroom!!!
{TIC TOC!!! TIC TOC!!!}
I found a Skirt...that was tight...around the waist... but.....I could breathe...sort of...
Good Enough!
Got my hair...mostly dry...
{It went...totally Flat... }
and put make up on...going down the road....
Hurry!!! Hurry!!!!
I made it to The Court House... had to park a block away...
So... I Ran!
In Heals!!!
It was then... I realized... I should have worn a SLIP...with This Skirt!!!!!
It was Sheer...Very...Very....Sheer!!!!!
{I was...thankful... I had a Longish... Suit Jacket on! Whew! and...I was wearing black hose... I told myself..."It's All Good!!!! Go! Go! Go!"}
As I was running down the street.... I remembered...
I Forgot My Camera!!! TIC TOC!!!! can't go back....!!!
I was smart enough..to know...I'd have to go through a metal detector...
 so... didn't bring my purse...That should at least... be a Breeeeeeze!
{They'd have a Field Day...in My Purse!!!}
Just..as I was climbing the Big Marble Steps...to The Court House...
The Zipper Broke...on my Skirt!!!
Holy Smokes!!!!!
{Dang That Snack!!!!}
Thankfully..it was snug enough...to stay up...and...my Jacket...was...LONGISH...
and...I Was Going To Make It...Just In Time...
{ minutes...minutes!!!}
Then...I get in the door... run smack into ...
a line...a Long...Line... with baby strollers... someone...kept setting off the detector....
and....
They are asking...Everyone... to take off...their... shoes...
and...
JACKETS!!!!
Oh....
My....
Lord....
as I made my way..to the front...
{My Mind Racing....on How...I was going to Get Out Of This!!!I thought...should he insist...I may...have to turn back... but...No...there was No Way...I would Miss This!!!}
I slipped off my shoes...
To see...my Big Toe... sticking...out of my Brand New Hose!!!
and...
A Big Fat Run.... Up My...well...Chubby... Leg!!!!!!
I put my shoes...in the tray...
and...it was as if...the man...KNEW....
by the look on my face....
He...simply.... should...Not...
 Ask me...to Take off my Jacket....
{think...he'd seen...enough...They are probably Trained...to Spot...this sort...of thing... : ) }
{I was wearing a sleeveless...tank top...under it... 
CAN YOU FRICKIN' IMAGINE!!!!
A Gaping....Zipper!!!!
Big...Fat... White Toe....
{with remnants... of Summers... Hot Pink...Nail Polish...and...Wafts... of Polly's Hair...all entwined...in my Black...Hose...}
A...Very...very....Sheer... Skirt...
and...
Arms...that Look Like Fluffy Marshmallows!!!!}
He let me through...with...Jacket...intact...
and No Alarm!
I ran...to get to the Court Room...where Klarika...was going to be...
to find...
It didn't start until....
1:30.... ; )
; ) ; ) ; )
oh my... : )
{she...had to be there...at 12:30... : ) }
But...I gotta Tell Ya!
It Was All Soooo Worth It!!!
I am So Glad I went....
It made me So Proud...to be an American!!!
They had Beautiful  Music...
Live...
We all Sang...!
 There was a Amazing Potpourri... of People...
From...all over the World!
The ages...were from 18 to 74....
all... becoming...American Citizens...
and...all...
So Very Proud...
Their Friends...and Loved Ones..were all Clapping...and Cheering!!!
{me...too!!!!}
It was Awesome!!!!
Everyone... should go...and sit in...once ...
It's....BEAUTIFUL!!!!!
My Heart...Swelled!!!
I am so Thankful... I was Invited...
It was a Wonderful...Gift...
It...Truly...Was!
Congratulations... Klarika....: )
My...Fellow....American!
She Looked...Stunning!!!
I have Never Seen her...with a Bigger Smile!
She...as were all of the others...Beaming!!!!!!!
I stood...and Congratulated The New...Americans...while waiting to give Klarika...a Big Squeeze!!!!
What.a Wonderful... Heart Warming...Event!!!
Love...to Ya All!
Barb C.
{Beneath... my 'Poised'... appearance... I am...Completely...Out...Of...Control'... : ) }
{Donita... I thought of you... when I titled..this post... : ) }
{ I realized...later... why my skirt was so... sheer... the lining...was tucked into my hose... OH MY GOSH!!!!!}
 
 
 


6 comments:

Virginiarose said...

Barb sweety that story has been every woman at one time or another. I laughed so hard. Iam so proud of you for making it.
59

simplyiowa said...

Hey...Ginger...!
Yes...
Each of those things...has happened to me... at one time...or another....
BUT NOT ALL OF THEM...AT ONE FRICKIN' TIME!!!!
Whew...
That...being said... I sure wouldn't have missed that...if I had to go NAKED!!!
{Oh Dear!}
Someone...up in Heaven...{along with All of the Busy Traffic....} must have been...ROLLING!!!!
oh my... : )
Love to ya...Sweet Pea...
Tell The Queen of Hearts... I said...'Hey'... : )
Hope to see ya at The Holiday Open House... I may have a Little Treasure...or two... for Ya!...
Barb C.

sue in mexico mo said...

LOL & LOL again. . .

simplyiowa said...


oh....Sue...
What a day....
What...a day....
Love to ya... : )

elizabeth said...

Oh to be a fly on the wall. You you you! Look at the lengths you go to for the ones you love.

simplyiowa said...

Oh...my...
All I can say is...
It was a Gift...
Every Bit of It!
and...it is....what it is....
Love Ya!